Religion can often be a source of comfort and community, a place where people find connection, purpose, and a sense of belonging. But for me, religion became a source of conflict and disunity when the beliefs that shaped the way we interact with one another, particularly within my family, did not align with my own identity.

As the only girl among four siblings, I’ve always felt a sense of being damaged. My parents, immigrants from the Philippines, have worked tirelessly throughout their time in America. In addition to being the only girl, I’m also the youngest of three brothers. People often say, “You’re so lucky,” or “You’re the baby of the family.” However, they fail to recognize the anxiety and burden that comes with it.

Featuring: JOYN

Heading into the holidays, we may find ourselves consuming more of that liquid joy…but for some of us, that joy comes with a certain glow. Not the kind that you work for with your 10-step skincare routine, but one you can’t really help. And then the comments start flowing in–you’ve probably heard them all. “Wow, you match your shirt.” “Are you alright? You’re looking a little red…” Why does this happen?!

The year was 2019, and I had just graduated college. Things were looking good… But then, the pandemic struck. At first, it was just vaguely in the news, but as the virus spread, so did the fear. And so we entered lockdown. With it went most of my IRL interactions with people non-digitally, and the start of a very long period of seemingly endless isolation...that is, until I discovered the world of VTubers.